Preparing for Holiday Visits

Nov 15

The holiday season can bring family together, often providing a unique chance to check in on aging loved ones' well-being. For those who don’t see their older family members regularly, subtle changes can signal shifting needs, which can be overwhelming to notice all at once.

Even though this time can be joyful, it can also be a time of increased stress for older adults, especially those who are used to a quiet, predictable routine. The presence of many guests, children running around, the added noise, and the disruption of daily schedules can be overwhelming for some. Many people find the holidays a sad time as they remember their loved ones who have died. It can cause feelings of anxiety or irritability. These environmental changes can even lead to confusion and heightened stress and may simulate cognitive decline but can just be normal aging.

For individuals with dementia or other memory impairments, the commotion, unfamiliar faces and routine changes may trigger distress or agitation. It's important to be mindful of how these changes might affect your loved one and provide quiet time or a designated space for them to retreat to if needed. Keeping some familiar elements in place, like favorite meals or daily habits, can help alleviate some of the disruption during the holiday season.

Recognizing Signs of Change

As our loved ones get older, small changes in their habits, appearance, or daily routines can tell us a lot about how they're really doing. By noticing things like how they dress, their hygiene, or the state of their home, we can catch potential problems before they become bigger issues. The video below and the printable checklist covers simple things to look for in their physical health, mental sharpness, and emotional well-being. Spotting these signs early helps you make good choices, give support where needed, and help them keep their independence and dignity as they age.

Click HERE for a printable observation checklist.

Ask Questions

Bringing up sensitive topics with aging loved ones can be challenging, especially when it involves changes in health, safety, or future planning. It’s natural to feel uncomfortable approaching these conversations, but using gentle, empathetic prompts can make it easier to discuss important matters. This list of conversation starters is designed to create a supportive atmosphere, helping you address tough subjects without causing defensiveness or anxiety. These questions invite openness and understanding, allowing your loved one to share their feelings and needs at their own pace. Through these thoughtful prompts, you can have meaningful conversations that honor their independence while ensuring their well-being.

Empathetic conversation starters for addressing sensitive topics with aging loved ones:

“I've noticed that things have changed a bit for you lately. How have you been feeling about it all?”

This is a gentle way to open up about observed changes, inviting them to share their perspective without feeling pressured.

“I want to make sure I’m supporting you in the best way I can. Are there any worries or challenges you’d like to talk about?”

This question shows your commitment to supporting them, while giving them space to open up if they’re ready.

“I was reading about some common challenges people face as they get older. Are there any things you’ve been finding a little harder lately?”

This can normalize the conversation by referencing outside information, helping to reduce any feelings of self-consciousness.

“It’s important to me to know what your wishes are for the future. Could we talk about what’s most meaningful to you when it comes to your health and well-being?”

This prompts a values-based conversation, encouraging them to talk about what matters most to them rather than diving directly into medical specifics.

“I've been thinking about how we can make things easier and safer for you at home. Is there anything you wish were a bit different?”

By focusing on improvements rather than problems, this question can open the door for them to express frustrations or challenges they may be hesitant to bring up.

“You’ve always been there for me. How can I make sure I’m here for you in the way you need?”

This question is a heartfelt way to frame support, reinforcing the trust and care you share.

These open-ended, compassionate questions can encourage loved ones to express themselves honestly and without pressure. Follow up with empathetic listening, and validate their feelings to ensure they feel supported in whatever they choose to share.

Click HERE for printable list.

Not Ready for a Caregiver

If you discover that your parents are not quite ready for a caregiver in the home and, like most older adults, want to stay in their home for as long as possible, you may be interested in some tools that can help support them and give you peace of mind. From motion sensors that provide alerts on daily activity to medication reminders and emergency contact systems, these tools can offer a layer of safety without the need for constant supervision. Additionally, technology that assists with reminders, fall prevention, and communication can allow them to maintain their routines independently. By using these supportive resources, you can help ensure your loved ones are safe and connected, while respecting their desire for independence.

Medication Reminders

Ensuring that older adults take their medications properly is essential, as missed doses or incorrect usage can have serious health consequences, especially when managing multiple prescriptions. Solutions like:

Pre-sorted pill packs from the pharmacy can simplify the process by organizing medications by day and time and reducing confusion.
Smart devices such as Alexa or smartwatches offer daily reminder alarms that can be customized to individual schedules, making it easier to remember doses.
CareLink360 and Jubilee TV provide additional support by offering scrolling reminders and information that can be integrated into daily routines, enhancing safety and consistency.

These are just a few ideas to empower older adults to manage their health more independently and give you peace of mind over the holidays and beyond.

Normal Aging

As we age, certain tools and technologies can help make daily life easier and safer, allowing us to maintain independence and stay connected. From devices that support memory and mobility to tools that enhance communication and safety, these resources can empower older adults to live comfortably and confidently at home. Here are some options designed to support normal aging and promote well-being.

Remote door locks and a Ring doorbell provide additional safety, giving them control over access and allows them to monitor visitors.
CheckinBee is an easy to use daily text check in system.
Alexa can assist with daily reminders, hands-free calls, and easy access to information, helping them stay organized, connected, and independent.
For financial safety, take a look at options available on AgeTechNow that can help monitor spending and detect unusual transactions, adding a further layer of security to prevent financial fraud.
Loop Digital frame is an easy way to keep older adults connected through pics and videos.
Smarter is a tech concierge to help assist your parents with any and all tech questions so you don’t have to.

Early Cognitive Impairment

Noticing signs of early cognitive impairment in a parent can be unsettling, but an early diagnosis is essential to understand the cause and to make proactive plans. A proper diagnosis provides clarity, enabling you to put safety measures in place that support independence while minimizing risks. While you are in the process of getting a diagnosis, there are quite a few tools to help with peace of mind and mitigate risk and promote independence at the same time.

Discreet motion sensors can monitor activity and alert you to irregular patterns, like wandering at night, without intruding on privacy.
Jubilee TV allows you to assist with TV issues remotely, reducing frustrations. You can also easily “drop in” for a video call on the TV screen and send scrolling messages.
TeleCalm is an app that blocks suspicious calls and limits the phone’s usage to trusted contacts, protecting your parent from scams and unwanted solicitations.
SingFit is an easy and fun music therapy app that helps uplifts and calms people through assisted singing.
CareLink360 was made for people who cannot (and should not) use a tablet anymore. It has a wide range of uses for people with mild to moderate cognitive impairment or dementia.

These tools can create a safer, more manageable environment at home, helping to protect vulnerable adults from potential risks.

The holiday season is a time for joy, laughter, and reconnecting with loved ones. It can also be stressful.

If we can be of help and a source of stress reduction, we welcome your questions and comments.

We wish you a happy holiday season.

Below are links mentioned in the above video:

Printable Observation Checklist

Silverts Adaptive Clothing

J. C. Penney Adaptive Clothing

9 Ways to Find Your Purpose As You Age by Psychology Today

Medication Interactions from WebMD

NIH Depression and Older Adults

Alzheimer’s Association 10 Early Signs of Dementia and Alzheimer’s